Ok so you want to hear some funny things from my past? You’ve heard of Trumpisms? Now I bring you, Heatherisms. These are three of the most popular and most well known phrases I have said in my past to my family. The ones my family will never let down. The ones that are brought up at almost every family get together. To the point where my wife even mentioned one at our wedding.
Let’s start with I believe is one of the first, funniest and craziest one…
Alla-walla-kiki: This phrase is translated to “All I want is Chicken” This was when I was very young shortly after being placed in my adoptive parents home. My now mom asked me what I wanted to eat for dinner. And “Alla-walla-kiki” is what came out of my mouth. She asked me again and again but that is all I kept saying (and I was getting frustrated). So finally while we were in the store she asked me to point out to her what it was that I wanted. So I pointed to some chicken. Some how some way she was able to translate it. To this day, I still love chicken.
Now the other two will not have to be translated but are still funny till this day.
Living in San Diego and our Grandparents living up in Bakersfield, CA we would drive up (5 hour drive) there every summer and us kids would stay up for a couple weeks. Well we had a old beat up Ford Pinto (lol, anyone remember those?). We had no air conditioning in the car, and there was 6 of us sometimes even more all crammed in the car (before the days of the law requiring to wear a seat belt). And I would yell out “I’m hot and I’m crowded” and what do i hear back in return “No shit, Heather” from my parents, as everyone in the car is hot and crowded going through the California grapevine during the summer.
Another good one Is I think back in 1983-84? We had to defrost the refrigerator. So we placed all the food in some ice chest. During that time I came in from playing outside to get a drink of milk. Opened up one of the chest picked up the milk and noticed it was squishing the sausage. For some unknown reason though I couldn’t think of the term Sausage so I read the package and it says pork links. Not sure why I was even concerned about this I blurted out “Who put the milk on the porky links?” (in like a southern accent) they all started laughing so loud. At the time I was upset cause they were laughing at me, but now I laugh at it every time I think of it, including now. It’s probably not as funny reading it as it is to hear it. So just trust me it was hilarious.
When Terry and I got married, we had a buffet dinner. Our guest were asked questions about us as a couple. The table who blurted our the correct answer first got to get up next to get their food. Table by table people went up to get their food. After my family’s table got up but before they got their food, Terry goes over and asked, “What i really want to know is, who put the milk on the porky links?” I’m sure that no one else in the room had a clue what she was talking about. But we all did. We never did find out who ever did, and I am sure we never will.
