Thank You to my Ex’s

When we break up with someone its generally a very sad moment in our lives. After all no one wants their heart to be broken.  God knows I have had

my share of heartbreak with two divorces and countless boyfriends / girlfriends in my past.   I am almost confident that the reasoning for my breakups is usually due to my constant arguing of wanting something they couldn’t or refused to give.

It wasn’t until my after my last relationship that ended in 2011 that I sat and thought to myself, that maybe it’s God’s way of planning something better for me.  I now consider all my past relationships to be a learning experience.  After all we can’t change the person we are with, only our self’s.

Albert Einstein’s definition of insanity: “doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome.”

The above quote applies to relationships too.  If you always find you’re having the same issues in your relationships something obviously needs to change.  And it’s probably you, that doesn’t mean its a bad thing.  Maybe you’re looking for that perfect person that all your family and friends love, they are incredibly attractive, a good job, financially set and has a good head on their shoulders.  I hate to tell you but I have news for you if you are.  Your not going to find that perfect person that checks every box on your wish list.  They simply don’t exist.  All you can do is decide what is the most important to you and let the other things slide.  Make a shorter “must have” list instead.

Then when you start that new relationship, remember everything you have learned from your previous relationships and apply it.  Since I had an issue with arguing in my past.  My learning experience is this:  Before you react to a situation think about it for a moment.  Think, is this going to be something I will even care about in 1-3 months if the answer is no, then let it slide.  Does the fact that he doesn’t open the door for you really a deal breaker when they do so many other great things.  This wasn’t an issue for me, but yes I have heard people bitch about such simple things as a door not being opened for them.

Now this doesn’t mean that I am perfect, I am far from it.  I do slip up but most of the time, but most of the time I do sit and think about it for a moment before I react to anything.

So thank you to my ex’s for the learning experience.  Thank you for letting me go so when you did so I could move on to bigger and greater things.  So I could allow myself to meet the person that I want to be a better person for.

Thank you, thank you, thank you…

Side note, I just realized that this is being published on what would have been the anniversary with my first husband….  Coincidence?